Chaos
by The-Loki
Summary: What happens after a Crow has finished his task ofvengeance?


CHAOS  
  
By The Dark One (Raven18_BB2@yahoo.com)  
  
-No.-  
  
-No Please.-  
  
-I don't want to.AAAAGGGGHHHH!!!-  
  
Sean Collins awoke with a shudder. The dreams again. You wouldn't expect to have dreams in the afterlife. Or to sleep for that matter. But you do. At least where he was. He was in the barracks of the archangel division of Heaven. Seems a lot of Crows end up here. At least the ones that didn't show weakness during their time of requital. During one of the many wars against Hell, some guerrillas from the Brigade of Demons made it through Heaven's gates and laid flame to all they saw. Jennifer was destroyed. Sean made a plea to return her, but the Council of Divinity claimed that Hellfire could completely obliterate a heavenly soul, with no hope of return. Sean angrily returned to the archangels, and grew slowly colder until all that was left was the battle rage. While he became a fierce enemy against Hell, he also blamed Heaven for its weakness in Jennifer's destruction. He became increasingly more dangerous and reckless until the rest of the battalion referred to him as "Chaos". Then the dreams began. Sean sensed truly paralyzing terror in whoever was screaming, and that it was taking place in a time before his time on Earth. He told no one of these visions, especially since everyone thought he was crazy enough. Sean returned to the Council of Divinity after months, in mortal time, of these dreams. He approached the Three and One. He/They addressed Sean.  
  
-SO CHAOS, I SEE YOU HAVE RETURNED TO US. DO YOU HAVE ANOTHER ENIGMA?-  
  
"You could say that. I have had visions of suffering and tragedy."  
  
-IN MY HEAVEN? I CERTAINLY DO NOT THINK SO-  
  
"I do, you three faced freak."  
  
-CHAOS! YOU TREAD DANGEROUS GROUND!-  
  
"What are you gonna do? All you do is sit on high and watch your cock get smaller!"  
  
-ENOUGH DARK ONE! WE NEED NONE LIKE YOU IN THIS HOLY PLACE-  
  
"Then throw me out, fuckface! I don't want to be here anyway!"  
  
Sean felt a blast unlike he had ever known, and Heaven dissolved before him. He was floating in a black void. There was nothing to see, hear, or feel. Sean let out a sigh. "Well, shit."  
  
Sean floated for what felt like an eternity. His only companions were his thoughts, memories, and visions. He heard the screaming woman again many times.  
  
Sean's thoughts drifted to his life and death on Earth. He remembered Tom Ryans. He chuckled to himself. He thought of the Crow.  
  
-Sean-  
  
"Onyx?" Onyx was the name of his Crow.  
  
-Yes Sean, I see you have gotten yourself into quite a predicament-  
  
"Yeah, well here I am."  
  
-I see you have changed, Sean. You have become.hard-  
  
"Just like you, Onyx."  
  
-It is not a condition I would wish upon someone, Sean-  
  
"Where are you? I can't see a thing."  
  
-Oh come on Chaos, I heard you liked the dark-  
  
"Who the hell was that?"  
  
-You, sir, can call me Jester. I'm what you'd call a coworker of your buddy Onyx-  
  
"Another Crow, huh?"  
  
-You bet your banished ass. My last assignment was a rather angry young man named Joshua Cord. I especially liked one particular thing he did."  
  
-Shut up! Sean, do you feel a cold wind?-  
  
"Yeah."  
  
-Go toward it-  
  
Sean swam toward the wind. It was completely frigid. Like a glacier.  
  
-You are almost there. Do not stop-  
  
Sean swam into the source of the wind and was pulled in by an irresistible force. Sean was dumped onto the ground. He looked up and saw a dark forest. The trees were black and dead. Every branch held a Crow. There were more than could be counted. At the top of one tree, above all the rest, was a Crow bigger then all the rest. He had to be the size of a vulture. His deep, bellowing caw silenced the other Crows' chatter.  
  
"He's a big, black beauty, isn't he, son?"  
  
Sean turned around and blinked when he saw a black figure in a duster and a cowboy hat facing him. There was a skull where his head should be.  
  
"Wha?"  
  
"Scared ya, didn't I, son? You would have met me during your return, but I was otherwise occupied."  
  
"Who are you?"  
  
1 "I'm the Skull Cowboy, Collins. I'm the manager of the service my birds and I supply."  
  
"Oh yeah, I heard of you from the archangels."  
  
2 "And I've heard of you, Collins. Or is it "Chaos" now?"  
  
"Doesn't matter who I am. What do you want with me?"  
  
3 "You've been having yourself some nasty dreams lately, haven't you?"  
  
"How did you know?"  
  
"Where do you think they came from? Besides, I'm not the one to ask."  
  
"Then who is?"  
  
All the crows in the trees suddenly took flight. From within the forest, a ball of black fire erupted. Out of the blaze flew a raven with eyes of fire. It alighted on the Skull Cowboy's shoulder.  
  
4 "Well, hello, Poe. Where's the boss man?"  
  
The bird's screechy voice was almost nauseating.  
  
4.1 He's coming.  
  
A second being emerged from the blaze. It was the most powerful looking figure Sean had ever seen. Muscle bulged from every inch of his frame. He had long black hair down to his shoulder blades. He wore a long black coat and black boots, but his eyes were captivating. They were like pure steel, the coldest eyes Sean could ever have imagined. His face was masked, however, with a shinobi hood. The mark of a raven was branded on the forehead of the hood.  
  
Sean felt a twinge of fear. He had battled some of the worst Hell had sent to do battle, but this creature was unlike anything he had ever encountered. The being regarded Sean with interest.  
  
5 "Raven, It's been awhile. And guess who we got here. This is Chaos. I'm sure you've heard of."  
  
"Yes" Raven's tone was quiet, but very powerful. The Skull Cowboy shut his mouth immediately. Raven turned to Sean. "You are Chaos. You are known to many."  
  
"Yeah, so?"  
  
"It is rare, one who can make enemies of Hell and Heaven."  
  
"Both full of dipshits."  
  
"Uh, son? You may not want to say that. See, Raven here holds special ranking in the bowels of Hell." The Skull Cowboy cautioned Sean.  
  
"True, but I am not a minion of Hell. The beings that you see before you have our own agenda."  
  
"Then what are you?"  
  
"We are not for you to understand"  
  
Leave it at that, you got business with us, boy. Poe spoke from the Skull Cowboy's shoulder and flew to Raven's.  
  
"What business?"  
  
"You were cast from Heaven, and Hell does not want you. Your only chance is with us."  
  
"What?"  
  
"The visions, Collins! What will you do about them?"  
  
"I don't know!"  
  
"You are aware that they depict a time unlike your own, yes? This realm you see is called Ravenloft. You will go there."  
  
"How?"  
  
The Skull Cowboy patted him on the back. "Time and space are barriers only to the living, son."  
  
"Then what am I supposed to do there?"  
  
"You will know."  
  
"I will know? That's it?"  
  
"This gig's a little different from your last one, Sean. It's not vengeance, and no Crow this time. At least not how you expect."  
  
The Skull Cowboy beckoned toward the forest. The Crows returned. Onyx and Jester landed on Raven's outstretched arms. "One a cold, calculating killer; the other a wisecracking smartass. A little yin-yang for spice. Now brace yourself, son. This gonna feel kinda.weird."  
  
Onyx and Jester started to circle Sean, and Raven began to chant in low tones. Poe began to glow with black light, and he hovered over Sean. Onyx and Jester took on the same glow. Raven and Poe let out a piercing scream, and Onyx and Jester became pure energy. They flew directly into Sean's body. Every muscle Sean had tensed to the point of snapping, then he went limp. The Skull Cowboy placed his hand on Sean's head. A thick fog enveloped them both. In the haze the Skull Cowboy whispered "Good luck, Sean." Sean replied coldly "There is no Sean Collins. I AM Chaos."  
  
The fog cleared and Chaos found himself in another dark place. He was on the side of an old country road. He could see a castle peeking over a hill. It was very quiet. Chaos dusted himself off and found he was wearing black trousers and boots, with a black coat out of the Revolutionary War. "What the hell?" he thought. He began walking toward where he saw the castle. He had walked maybe a mile when he heard screaming. A man in torn clothes ran toward him. His face was very bloody.  
  
"He.Help me! It's going to kill me!"  
  
"What?"  
  
"The Shukayaga!"  
  
"Whatever."  
  
Chaos was about to turn the man away when he felt the presence of a strong spiritual energy. He turned around and saw a massive human torso with no head floating down the road toward them. It emanated an eerie glow of yellowish-green. The man shrieked like a woman and took off down the road. The Shukayaga ignored the fleeing man and focused its attentions on Chaos. Chaos was not sure what to do. He was in a mortal body again and was not a Crow, as far as The Skull Cowboy had told him. The Shukayaga took hold of Chaos and began to squeeze. Chaos felt ribs cracking. He was sure he was going to die again. Suddenly he felt a rush of power and threw the Shukayaga's arms off of him. He let out a beastial scream and plunged his hand right through the flesh and muscle of the headless torso's chest. He felt the heart and took a strong grip. With a low growl, Chaos pulled the Shukayaga's heart free from its body. The being dissipated into nothingness. The heart then dissolved into dust. Chaos felt as if he was about to vomit and fell to his knees. His glance caught a puddle in the road and he saw himself. His skin had turned ghost white, and his eyes and lips were black, with extending lines from each. He looked exactly as he did when he had returned to Earth as a Crow. He watched as his skin and face faded to their normal colors. He shook his head in disbelief and arose. He continued walking toward the castle he had seen until he came to the top of the massive hill. He saw a village and the castle further ahead. He saw a building with several lights in its windows and continued toward it. He walked through the streets and looked around. The style was distinctly 19th century on Earth. He heard commotion coming from the well- lighted building and headed toward the door. He saw the sign above it. "The Drowned Rat". Chaos walked in and saw a tavern with lots of burly men in 19th century attire and wench-types serving ale. He heard a voice yell, "That's him!" The same man from the road approached him. He had been cleaned up and was wearing new clothes. "He's alive!"  
  
The rest of tavern looked at Chaos. The bartender said "Thought fer sure the Shukayaga got ya." Chaos replied, "What? That headless torso thing? I ripped its heart out." The populace of the tavern let out several gasps and began to mutter amongst themselves. A large man, standing about 6' 6" and around 250 pounds, let out a laugh. "A likely story. You sure you didn't just run like the other sheep, long hair?"  
  
Chaos let out a light chuckle. "You want none of this, fatass." The large man stood up and the rest of the people ran to the walls. Chaos stood his ground and remarked "What's the matter? Are you gonna do something or do you need another round?" The large man reached behind and pulled out a long hunting dagger. Chaos outstretched his arms and said, "Here I am. A martyr, ready for the lions. Prick." The large man rushed him and plunged the knife into Chaos' stomach. Chaos looked down at the dagger protruding from his body and looked up again. The large man stepped back with a look of fear. "What are you?" Chaos noticed his skin was pure white again and he felt the rush of power. The large man backed up into the far wall. He pulled the dagger from his body and looked at it. "This is a nice blade. You want it back? Here ya go." He whipped the dagger back at the large man, landing in the wall half an inch below his crotch. "I'm in the mood for some random property damage. How about you?" Chaos leapt across four tables at the large man and planted his foot right through the man's face and into the wall.  
  
Everyone in the tavern shrieked and ran out the door, but one stayed behind. He was very drunk and wore the cloth of a priest. Chaos removed his foot from the man's face and looked at him in a curious manner.  
  
"Aren't you scared, old man?"  
  
The priest stood up and shook his head vigorously. His drunken state seemed to leave him.  
  
"Why, no I'm not. I've seen stranger things in my time."  
  
"Who are you, old man?"  
  
"My name is Father Jebidiah Crow. And I can see in you the aura of one that was once Heavenly."  
  
"What?"  
  
"I may be a priest, but I'm not so ignorant as to deny the existence of other powers. I possess abilities of the psychic school."  
  
"I like you already, Crow."  
  
"But what are you now, Mr.?"  
  
"Call me Chaos. I'm really not sure what I am now. I was once an archangel, but now I'm not."  
  
"Well, what are you doing in Ravenloft?"  
  
"I don't know that either. I'm supposed to find out. I was dumped from another realm on the road about two miles out of town."  
  
"Then maybe your business lies with Lord Isaac. He lives in the castle not far from here, and he is the Lord of this domain, Noruba. The woman he loved was burned at the stake, and he married her sister to care for her. However, he remains very friendly and welcoming."  
  
Chaos nodded to Father Crow and began to leave. Crow stopped him. "Uh, Chaos. Before you see Lord Isaac, you may want to change your clothes. You're a little ragged." Just as Father Crow finished his sentence, Chaos was attired with the dress of a period gentleman. "Uh, that's better."  
  
Chaos looked a little surprised. "I guess I can do more than I thought."  
  
Chaos exited the tavern and started toward the castle again. He approached the courtyard and began to feel very powerful, dark energy permeating from the building. "This must be the place." He went up to the gate and pulled the rope. A pleasant sounding tone came from the bell attached to the rope. An attendant who looked rather pale and weak came out to see to the caller. He spoke to Chaos with a raspy voice. "And who might you be?"  
  
"I am Lord Randall Rystol. Father Jebidiah Crow informed me that Lord Isaac dwells here."  
  
"You are correct, sir. But what business do you have with Lord Isaac?"  
  
"That is between Lord Isaac and myself. May I see him, please?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
The attendant opened the gate and led Chaos inside. He was directed to a dining room and seated. "The Lord and Lady will join you shortly."  
  
Within minutes, a tall, dark-haired, immaculately dressed man and a lovely, fair lady entered the room and seated themselves next to Chaos. The man flashed a friendly smile and spoke. "Welcome, sir. I am Lord Isaac, and this is my wife, the Lady Beth. I understand that you have business concerning me."  
  
Chaos was stuck. He hadn't bothered to think of why he was here. Suddenly several names came to his mind. "I come from the domain of Severia to ask for assistance. Siege is being laid to my Domain, and I need help."  
  
Lord Isaac held his chin and thought a moment. "Beth, will you bring us some tea? I need to discuss this matter further." Lady Beth politely obliged and went to the kitchen. Lord Isaac's demeanor took on a new aura. He seemed to grow contemptuous of Chaos. "Now, we can cut the shit. You are no Lord of any domain, and you have no business with me. At least not that of which you speak. If my wife were not here, I would disembowel you and use your blood to oil the wheels of my carriage!" Chaos stood his ground and spoke calmly. "Well, I'll have to thank the little lady when she returns." Lady Beth came back with a tray and a pot of tea. Chaos got up. "I'm sorry, madam, but I must take my leave. Your Lord Isaac seems to have.other issues to deal with." Lady Beth seems disappointed. "But you have only just arrived, Lord Randall." "I am sorry again, madam." Lady Beth went back to the kitchen to return the tea. Chaos crossed his eyes and stuck his tongue out at Isaac. "I'll be seeing you again. And you are more than you appear to be as well." Chaos quickly exited the manor.  
  
Chaos waited until the manor had turned in to sleep, altered his clothing to ninja gear, and climbed the wall leading to the window of the master bedroom where the Lord and Lady slept. He waited noiselessly for half an hour hanging off the wall and he thought, "What am I doing here?" Chaos heard the voice of the Skull Cowboy echo in his mind. "Just wait, son. The time is coming soon." Chaos then heard arguing coming from the bedroom.  
  
"He seems very nice, Isaac!"  
  
"He is a liar and he should be killed! How can you like him?"  
  
"Lord Randall is very polite! How can you not like him!"  
  
SMACK!  
  
Chaos heard a loud crack and heard Lady Beth begin to cry. Isaac let out a low growl.  
  
No.  
  
No please.  
  
I don't want to.AAAGGGHHH!!!  
  
"NOW CHAOS! NOW!"  
  
Chaos burst through the window, went into a forward roll, and leapt up onto the bed, between Lord Isaac and Lady Beth. Lord Isaac's eyes were pure red, and he had fangs bared. He glared evilly at Chaos. "Rystol! You begin to annoy me!"  
  
Chaos switched to Crow mode and remarked, "Hasn't anyone told you about spousal abuse? Ruins a lot of marriages, I've heard. Didn't your mother tell you not to marry vampires, Lady Beth? Sure the night life is fun, but they're corpses during the day." Isaac let out a scream and flew at Chaos. He sidestepped and slapped Isaac in the back the head, sending him careening into the wall, his head going right through the stone. Chaos smirked, "Now that's what I call cheap construction." Isaac pulled his head out the wall and muttered unidentifiable words. Green light emanated from his hands, and he fired it at Chaos. Chaos rolled under the blast toward Dominic, and swept out his legs. Dominic crashed to the ground, and his blast was directed at the ceiling, knocking loose a large stone. The stone fell on top of Lady Beth and crushed her. Chaos grimaced. "Whoops." Isaac screamed in anguish. "BETH! You bastard! Kanchelsis! I need you!" The entire castle began to shake and crumbled to the ground. Isaac and Chaos threw off the stones on top of them and stood up. They were about to fight again when the sky began to rain deep red blood. A large red gate of swirling blood appeared in the sky. A slim, half-elven, well-dressed male stepped out of the gate. He looked around at the destruction. "My, my Isaac. It seems you have yet to learn restraint." Isaac's red eyes flashed in anger. "This creature invaded my home and killed my wife! I have served you faithfully! Destroy him!" Kanchelsis looked at Chaos and his cold eyes hinted a bit of contempt. "So! You are one of Raven's children! I shall enjoy this thoroughly!"  
  
"Mastraacht, you finally show yourself."  
  
"Who calls me by that name?" The Vampire God turned around and his jaw dropped at the sight of Raven and Poe standing before him. "You sure know how to keep yourself aloof, until now."  
  
Kanchelsis growled and his body began to change. His muscles bulged, his clothes ripped, and hair sprouted everywhere. He howled like a beast and he attacked Raven, talon-like nails slashing. Isaac again flew at Chaos, knocking him to the ground. As Chaos and Isaac grappled, Raven was busy parrying the Vampire God's claws and countering with elbows and knees. Kanchelsis began to utter a spell, but Raven broke his jaw with an uppercut. Poe flew behind the beast's head, and grabbing a clawful of hair, pulled the creature's head back. Raven drove his fist in the beast's exposed throat. Kanchelsis fell to the ground choking. Raven gripped Kanchelsis' head and every fiber of the god's being exploded with pain. While this was transpiring, Chaos took Isaac's back, wrapped his arm around the vampire's neck, and squeezed with all his strength. Isaac's head popped off his body with a disgusting crack. Chaos' hands began to burn with black flame, and he set Isaac's body ablaze. Raven pulled out a vial of holy water and called to Chaos. "Hold his mouth open." Chaos did so, and Raven poured the liquid down the Vampire God's throat. The beast's body began to give off smoke and dissolve. Soon there was only a puddle of pus. "Well done, Chaos. Lord Isaac was a servant of Mastraacht, and they were becoming too powerful to be allowed to roam free. You drew them out, and we could put a stop to this. Mastraacht is not gone, however. He will regenerate, but he will be too weak to leave this realm. Come, I have other jobs for you to do." He reached out to Chaos. Chaos stepped back. "I don't think so. I did your dirty work twice now. I'm no one's errand boy."  
  
"Chaos, do not be a fool. Your only chance is with us. You can never enter Heaven or Hell again." "Well, my little trip here has shown me something. Heaven, Hell, and you aren't all there is. I'll take my chances with the void. After all, time and space are barriers only to the living." Chaos leapt in the air and became pure energy, as Onyx and Jester had. A mist enveloped him, and he disappeared. Raven shook his head and looked at Poe. "That fool. He has no idea what is out there." Poe nodded.  
  
He'll be lost. Evermore.  
  
Chaos was floating in the same black void that had been when he was cast from Heaven. This time, though, he had learned something. He was actually in the limbo that was all worlds and no world. In this realm, he could go anywhere he wished with but a thought. He thought, "Ravenloft was alright, but somewhere less dismal would be better." Chaos heard the sounds of battle. Clanging steel, breaking bone, and many grunts of exertion. "Sounds like fun." Chaos swam toward the sounds and was again pulled by a strong force. He fell from the sky and into a forest. He was scraped by branches and thorns on the way down, finally landing with a grunt stomach-first on a large branch ten feet off the ground. As he was draped over the branch he thought, "There has got to be a better way to do this." Chaos looked down and saw a skirmish of bugbears and dwarves. Almost every combatant was armed with an axe, and it looked as though the dwarves and bugbears were dead even. One dwarf, however, was cutting a swathe through his opponents. He was severing legs, splitting genitals, and even jumping on the bugbears' heads and pounding them with the butt of his axe. Chaos was fascinated by this dwarf. Not only was he the best fighter, but he was also the smallest. He was probably only three feet tall. The dwarves were starting to gain the upper hand, but a surprise was in store for them. Out of the trees came a monstrous bugbear specimen. It was eight feet tall and muscle-bound, with huge fangs and wielding a morning star. He began to smash dwarven skulls at will. A panic went up. One dwarf screamed, "Hruggek! Retreat!" Chaos didn't care who won, but he hated to see a truly great warrior like that dwarf vanquished. He dropped from his branch right in front of the bugbear. The creature was startled by this being with chalk white skin and strange black marks on his face. "What manner of demon are you?"  
  
"None of consequence."  
  
Chaos slammed his shin into the bugbear's knee with a picture-perfect leg kick. It buckled, but did not fall.  
  
"Uh, oh", Chaos thought. Just then the little dwarf leapt on the bugbear's head, pounding with his little fists. The bugbear started clawing at the dwarf, trying to dislodge him. Chaos grabbed the bugbear's torso and started driving knees as hard as he could into the creature's crotch. Chaos struck it about five times, and the bugbear turned pale white and retched, coughing up its own testicles. The bugbear keeled over and died, and the rest of the battalion ran away. A ghostly form escaped from the large bugbear's body and beckoned to the pair. "I will see thee both in Pandemonium." The little dwarf spat on the body. "Yeah? Well, we'll be seeing you missing your orbs!" He then turned to Chaos and vigorously pumped his hand. "Many thanks, comrade. Name's Dogmar Shortstuff."  
  
"Chaos."  
  
"That's all?"  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"Don't like to talk much, ay? Oh well, that's all right. Your help is much appreciated."  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"So, silent one! Would you accept a gesture of thanks? I would invite you to our home to celebrate this victory over Hruggek."  
  
"Okay."  
  
Dogmar, Chaos, and the surviving members of the dwarven battalion went out of the forest toward a mountain. Dogmar beckoned to the mountain. "Welcome, Chaos, to Toramor, the home of the clan of Clangeddin Silverbeard!" One of the dwarfs pressed a stone lodged in the rock wall, and a crevice opened in the side of the mountain. The battle caravan moved in, and Chaos smacked his head on the way through the door. Dogmar laughed. "Watch yourself. You're a bit taller than what we're used to." The dwarves discarded their armor and weapons and took seats at a large table in a huge cavern. A large boisterous cry went up from the dwarfs. "Victory! Victory! Bring the ale!" Within minutes, females and children rushed out food and drink for the warriors. Within an hour, the majority of the dwarfs were completely hammered. Slurred boasting, arguments, and old drinking songs filled the hall. Dogmar and Chaos had several tankards, but kept to themselves. They spent the time in discussion. Dogmar Shortstuff explained to Chaos that he was so small because he was the bastard child of a dwarf and a gnome. His stature forced him to learn to fight real fast, and he soon became the best around. His skill caught the attention of the clan of Clangeddin Silverbeard, who followed the dwarven god of battle. He was recruited and quickly surpassed all of them. This clan was always coming into conflict with Hruggek, the bugbear god of war, who basically hated everyone. That was why they were battling in the forest. "Oh joy, everywhere I go, I piss off another god." Chaos thought. Then Dogmar asked him where he was from. Chaos replied, "Nowhere."  
  
"Everyone's from somewhere."  
  
"I am. Nowhere. Leave it at that."  
  
"Okay, you helped us. I won't pry. Now, LET'S PARTY!"  
  
Dogmar leapt up onto the table and threw himself into the crowd of his clansmen. They carried him mosh-pit style to the head chair and toasted him. Dogmar took a mighty swig and called for a toast to Chaos. The other dwarfs obliged. As the party was reaching its climax, unexpected guests arrived. A band of elves were outside the door, demanding entrance. The dwarfs allowed them in, and told them to state their business. The band of elves numbered around eight, all dressed in battle gear. Six were men, slim but strong looking. The two women were beautiful, but had the look of they could seriously whip some ass. They were dressed in green and brown, for camouflage, and were armed with bows, medium-length swords, and daggers. The two women eyed Chaos with interest. He winked at them, and they exchanged glances. One of the male elves stepped forward. He had long black hair tied back, and carried a long bow across his back, and had two short swords in his belt. "We heard you had a skirmish with Hruggek, and we didn't want you to have all the fun alone." Dogmar stood up to address the elf. "Sorry, Shadowwind, but we already won, thanks to our new friend here. This here's Chaos. Never seen anything like him." Shadowwind went up to Chaos and bowed. "A friend of the clan of Silverbeard is a friend of ours. We are the Nightstalker elves, another band like this clan, but we operate differently. We help each other out in fixes." Chaos nodded. "Okay."  
  
Dogmar invited the Nightstalkers to stay, and they proceeded to celebrate for a time. An hour or two later, that would all change. A dwarven scout interrupted the party with cries of alarm. "Orcs! Orcs are approaching the mountain!" At this point, most of the dwarves were passed out from the alcohol, and half of the elves were not of fighting condition. The only ones left were Chaos, Dogmar, though he was a bit stumbly, Shadowwind, and the two female elves. Shadowwind told the females to find a ledge on the mountain face and bombard the orcs with arrows. They grabbed their bows and quivers and proceeded out the back entrance. Dogmar took his axe and stood wobbling. "I.I'mmmmmmmm.ready." Shadowwind drew his two swords, and Chaos took a sword off one of the unconscious elves. He had never used a sword before, but it was better than empty hands. He could hear the sound of the door being broken down, as well as the screams of the orcs being shot by the female elves. Eventually the women ran out, and the orcs broke down the door. They proceeded to rush in, only to meet the blades of Dogmar, Shadowwind, and Chaos. Dogmar rushed the orcs head-on, his drunken bravado making him even more reckless than usual. Shadowwind did his name justice, spinning and angling with impossible finesse. His twin blades moving like a whirlwind through the orcs. Chaos went to Crow mode, ran up a wall, and did a backflip, landing behind the horde of orcs. A few turned around and gawked at the white demon just long enough to be decapitated by his blade. Shadowwind saw this and exclaimed, "What in the name of Corellon?" Chaos shouted, "Don't worry about it! Just keep going!" Dogmar was getting a bit overwhelmed by the orcs surrounding him, but he just smirked and dropped his axe. The orcs chuckled with malice and moved in for the kill. Dogmar reached in his belt pulled out a hilt with no blade. The orcs laughed heartily. Chaos looked puzzled by this. Shadowwind called to him, "Chaos! He's fine! Keep fighting!" Chaos shrugged and continued. Dogmar let out a laugh of his own and flicked the hilt with his thumb. A six-foot blade popped out of the hilt, and Dogmar began to thrash orc ass anew. The orcs began to make a retreat, but Chaos was still blocking the entrance and hacked to shreds any that tried to pass him. Within minutes, the hall was littered with orc corpses. Shadowwind sat down and wiped off his blades, and Dogmar grabbed another tankard of ale. "This calls for a bit of the bubbly!" he shouted, and downed it in one shot. Chaos slipped back to normal and took a few swings with the sword. It seemed to fit him well. Shadowwind spoke. "How did you do that?"  
  
"I can't really explain. I just do it."  
  
"I know someone that might know. His name is Elistar. He's a moon mage, and fairly powerful. He's rather familiar with strange magic. We could go now, if you wish. Dogmar! Come with us! We're going to see Elistar!"  
  
Dogmar sneered. "That crazy mage? You know I despise magic!"  
  
Shadowwind smiled. "But he has good ale brewed from magic. And we may find some goblins!"  
  
"WOO-HOO! I'm in!"  
  
Shadowwind told the two females, Vixby and Alianora, to watch every one else, and tell them where they had gone.  
  
Shadowwind, Chaos, and Shortstuff trekked for the Northern Region of the land, toward the Kryptgarden forest. The month of Uktar was coming to a close, and it was becoming very cold, and snow was starting to fall. Dogmar was starting to have trouble walking, with snow up a third of his body. Shadowwind found this rather humorous, and couldn't stop cracking jokes about it. Chaos finally carried the dwarf on his shoulders, and listened as the Dogmar and the elf told tales of their exploits to pass the time. Dogmar refused to be outdone, telling outrageous stories of how he had defeated an army of ten thousand kobolds without putting his beer down. Shadowwind retaliated with a tale of how he had infiltrated a stronghold of Drow in the Underdark all by himself and made off with a scripture of Lloth. Then they asked Chaos what he had done.  
  
"Crucified three, shot one, burned two, put my foot through the face of one, pulled the head off a vampire, killed a bugbear god, fought the minions of Hell, pissed off a lot of gods."  
  
That ended the telling of tales for a while. It was getting very cold. It was just past midday, and the air was just above freezing. The wind began to blow harder and all three felt the chill bite through to their bones. They hoped to find a town to escape the frigid weather. Ahead they saw three dwarfs with a fire going alongside the road. One saw them and arose. "Well met!" he cried in a gruff voice. "Me name's Hather, 'n' this is Bithendil 'n' Jaemor." The other two arose. "Are ye three heading north? Can ye help out a few who be needy?" Dogmar immediately responded, "Of course, brother! How can we be of service?"  
  
Hather grinned a toothy grin. " Ye're as kind as ye look. We three are miners. Our mine is off on the other end of this forest. Our employer is a mage- an elf mind you-, by the name of Elistar." Shadowwind interrupted. "We're heading to see Elistar anyway." Hather beamed. "Excellent! Then ye won't be goin' out of ye're way. But, he's been gone awhiles, and I don't know when he will return. Otherwise, we'd ask for his help. But abouts a week ago, Tjegg, oh poor Tjegg, vanished. We searched but only found this boot." Hather pulled out a bloodstained, torn boot. "Please understand, the mine is free o' monsters, but there was a great collapse, and something wicked must o' gained entry. Tjegg was our best fighter, so whatever took him.well, we sealed the mine and set to out to find help, and here ye are. Will ye aid us?" Shadowwind thought for a moment. "Is there something you can offer us?" Hather explained he could offer meals and a bed as long as needed, and some gold and sapphires from the mine. Shadowwind said it sounded good to him, Dogmar was eager to help the dwarfs, and Chaos merely shrugged and said, "Okay."  
  
Hather wooped and started off the path into the wood. "Come! I'll show the way!" The rest of the party groaned, and followed. Hours passed with Hather's incessant chatter, and the party soon became very bored. The only interesting thing was Dogmar was sprayed by a skunk and had to follow about fifteen feet behind. Shadowwind caught a sight of a magnificent stag and shot it straight in the neck. Chaos had to carry the corpse to use as dinner. What seemed like an eternity later, Hather stopped mid-sentence in his diatribe on dwarven metallurgy and announced, "We're almost there!" He beckoned to a small cabin a hundred paces ahead. It was small and rustic, and had a large stone chimney. A silver holy symbol and garlic were hung on the door. Hather opened the door, stomped the snow off his boots, and walked inside.  
  
Chaos left the deer outside and went in with the rest of the party. He pulled Hather aside and asked, "What's with the stuff on the door?" Hather mumbled that it was rumored the forest was haunted, but they had never had any trouble. Jaemor prepared the deer, and everyone ate well, except Chaos, who didn't need food. He didn't sleep, either, so he volunteered to take watch. Bithendil offered to join him. Two hours later, everyone was asleep, including Bithendil. Chaos sat unblinking in front of the fireplace, whose flames had burned low, casting long shadows around the room. Two of the shadows began to take familiar shapes. Those of crows.  
  
-Chaos! What the Hell have you done!-  
  
"Huh?" Chaos thought.  
  
-Sean.You have condemned yourself-  
  
"Onyx?"  
  
-Don't forget about me, dumbass! I'm stuck in here, too!-  
  
"Oh yeah, Jester. Where are you?"  
  
-In you, Sean. In case you forgot, we are all one being now-  
  
"Yay."  
  
-Raven will not allow you to elude him for long-  
  
-You ran off with two of his best birds! No one's ever done that before!-  
  
"I'm no one's employee.I guess we're stuck with each other."  
  
-It is possible. No one has ever been in this position before-  
  
-Help! I'm trapped in here with a fugitive and a cranky old fart!-  
  
"SHUT UP!" Chaos and Onyx thought in unison. The conversation was broken by the sound of scratching at the door of the cabin. It sounded as something was trying to claw its way into the cabin. Chaos did a backward roll, sprang up, and walked soundlessly to the door. Shadowwind had already woken up and was heading toward the door with a short sword. Chaos tapped his shoulder and told him to stand back. Chaos opened the door and saw a horde of undead beings standing before him. Twenty zombies, a few skeletons, and a werewolf were seething in front of the cabin, aching for blood. Chaos flashed a slightly annoyed expression and remarked, "Do you people mind? I was in the middle of a very important conversation." Chaos' finger sparked with a tiny black flame, and he pointed at the horde. Every being dissolved into dust in the fireball. Chaos sighed, shut the door, and turned to Shadowwind. "Jehovah's Witnesses." And sat back down in front of the fire.  
  
"Now, where were we?"  
  
Shadowwind shook his head. "Jehovah's.what?" He went back to bed.  
  
The next day they grew close to the Krypthome. Hather told them they could tell by the pink trees. Chaos thought Hather was starting to lose his mind. He then noticed a cluster of hot pink spruces next to the trail up ahead. They looked horribly out of place in the snow-draped forest. Chaos asked Hather what was up with the trees. All three dwarves replied, "Magic". Hather explained that Elistar's spells didn't always work the way he meant them to. Chaos shrugged at this and they continued. They approached a small hill thickly blanketed with snow. The snow began to move, melted by the sun, and fell off, revealing a wooden roof. The roof was fifty feet high, and there was a pair of massive double doors. Hather spoke up, "This here be the Krypthome. The entrance to the mine be a few yards down that way." He pointed at a trail leading into the forest. "We'd come with ye, but it's dangerous. We'll leave the peril to ye professionals." The three dwarves went into the Krypthome. Chaos, Shortstuff, and Shadowwind continued toward the mine. They proceeded along to the base of the hill. They heard cascading water ahead. As they got closer, they saw a small stream running down the steep, rocky slope. That is, until it reached a point six feet up the hill. There the stream suddenly leapt out of the air, away from the hill, and arced to a point almost thirty feet off the ground, before the water began to fall to earth again. Passing under the waterfall was the only way forward. Dogmar snorted. "What's the matter? You afraid of water?" He continued forward. As he passed under the stream, he began to float off the ground. "WAAH! What kind of magic is this?" Shadowwind stood open-mouthed, and Chaos merely watched. Dogmar stopped right at the height of the stream, where he was drenched by the current. "Akpth! Somebody get me down!"  
  
Shadowwind yelled up, "How? We've got nothing to reach up there!" Behind him, Chaos was in Crow mode and was backing up, preparing to jump. He sprinted a few feet, and leapt up to Dogmar. He passed over the stream, grabbed the soaking dwarf, and landed like a cat with Dogmar in his arms. Chaos smirked.  
  
"Remember to cash in your frequent flyer miles."  
  
"What?"  
  
"Never mind. Just get off me. You're soaked to the bone."  
  
The entrance to the mine lay dead ahead. The door was made of solid stone and barred with massive wooden beams. A system of pulleys was attached to a hand crank mounted on the side of the hill. Shadowwind and Dogmar removed the beams, and Chaos began to crank the pulley. The door swung outward on its huge iron hinges, creaking loudly. Inside the dark passage led into the depths of the mountain.  
  
They started down the cavern tunnel and turned into a large open space. There were several trails of footprints on the ground. Shadowwind knelt down, and observed the tracks. He smelled the ground. "Two goblins and a dwarf. It looks as if they drug the dwarf down the tunnel." Dogmar ran off down the tunnel after the tracks. Suddenly he stopped when he heard a strange "honk". He took another step. "Honk".  
  
"Wha?" Dogmar said. He took several steps forward. Each step was accompanied by a honk.  
  
"What is going on here!" Dogmar bellowed unnecessarily loud. Shadowwind hushed him. "We don't know what's down here."  
  
"Oh. Right."  
  
Suddenly Shadowwind's ears perked up. "Did you hear that?"  
  
"What?"  
  
"Somebody just ran off down that tunnel."  
  
Dogmar tripped and fell on a large patch of moss. A loud HONK filled the cavern. Chaos sighed.  
  
"If anyone didn't know we were here, they know now." Dogmar poked at the moss he had fallen on. Each time he touched it, a little honk escaped. Shadowwind made a connection.  
  
"It's the moss that's making all the noise. Elistar's a wild mage, after all, and his spells tend to go haywire. This moss must be a side effect of his magic. So stay off the moss. And we had best follow whomever ran off. Probably one of those goblins. I can still smell him. Follow me." The trio took off down the tunnel after the fleeing goblin. They came to the end of the tunnel and found another cavern. An unconscious dwarf was tied to a rock, and a large lynx was sleeping in front of him. A goblin holding a glowing orange sword and a black mask stood between Chaos, Shadowwind, and Shortstuff. A second goblin appeared behind them, holding a bag. He turned the bag upside down, dropping out two giant spiders, and vanished again. The second prodded the lynx awake, commanded it to attack in what sounded like Spanish, and made a Z in the air. He then leapt into the fray. Dogmar drew his six-foot blade, Shadowwind his two swords, and Chaos his single blade. The fray began. The insane Zorro clone immediately went for Shadowwind, and the lynx attacked Shortstuff. Chaos prepared to face the spiders when he felt a searing pain in his leg. He dropped to one knee and heard laughing. The laughing turned to a gasp of horror when the wound healed and Chaos stood back up. The goblin was invisible, and Chaos knew where he was now. He looked at the ground and saw two foot indentations in the dust. He made a lunge at the general area, and his arm caught something solid. He groped around for the neck, found it and squeezed. He had to deal with the spiders, too, so he slashed at them while he strangled the goblin underneath him. He felt the pain of a dagger slashing him, but his lacerations healed and he continued to squeeze. Dogmar had his hands full with the lynx, which moved faster than what seemed normal. The beast had already knocked his blade and his axe away, and was about to pounce. The lynx lunged for his legs, and Dogmar sprawled onto its back. The little dwarf began to bite the lynx on the head and neck. The beast began to scream in pain, and thrashed violently. Dogmar clenched his teeth harder and held on for dear life. Shadowwind also had trouble with goblin with the orange sword, who seemed was even faster than him. His twin blades were barely keeping him from being hurt, and his attacks were constantly being parried. The elf finally had to back off and circle the goblin, catching his bearings. Suddenly he had an idea. He charged forward, screaming a barbarian battle cry, dropped one sword, and held the other high over his head. The goblin smirked and brought his sword up to counter the blow. Shadowwind feinted downward, drawing the goblin's attention. Then, in fashion that would have made Chaos proud, delivered a leg kick that swept the goblin hard onto his face on the ground. Shadowwind quickly ran the goblin through. Shortstuff, who was still holding on to the lynx, yelled, "A little help here!" Shadowwind removed his bow and fired at the beast. The arrow pierced the cat's head, killing it and missing Dogmar by about half an inch. "Whoa! Watch your aim! You almost hit me!"  
  
"Drat! I almost had you, too!"  
  
"Oh, shut up."  
  
Chaos had already killed the other goblin, but now had the giant spiders on top of him, and was pinned to the ground. The elf and the dwarf saw this, cracked grins to each other, and ran the spiders through with their blades. Chaos dusted himself off and Dogmar giggled. "Looks like you aren't so invincible, after all, eh?" Chaos threw a backfist at Dogmar's head so fast his beard rustled, even though he had missed.  
  
"Don't get cocky."  
  
They untied the dwarf, who when he woke up, revealed himself to be Tjegg. They returned to the cabins,  
  
where the other dwarves were staying. When they entered, they saw an elf in robes with lunar runes standing with the dwarves. Shadowwind recognized him immediately. "Elistar. Where have you been?"  
  
"Here and there." The mage replied. "I see you have done me a great service. I must repay you. Come with me to my estate." The party entered the Krypthome. They were given food and drink. A few pouches of gold were bestowed. Elistar went into his private chambers for a short time. He returned with a scroll in his hand. He opened it. "I was saving this, but I suppose this is a good time. You look battle weary. This is a spell of extra healing. It will rejuvenate you." Elistar began to read the strange words. A blue glow surrounded the elf, the dwarf, and the Crow. There was a brilliant flash, and they vanished. Elistar scratched his head. "Or was that a gate spell? Oops."  
  
The disoriented trio appeared with a flash of light, into the middle of what seemed like the end of the world. There were explosions everywhere, large structures were collapsing, and huge machines were rolling over everything in sight. Shadowwind and Dogmar were freaking out. They had never seen anything like this. Chaos surveyed the area, looking for any way to escape the carnage. They had appeared in the bowels of a trench, so they were covered. Their safety, however, was short-lived. A robot soldier, armed with a missile launcher, appeared over the top of the trench. It took aim at the three and was about to fire, when it exploded with a ball of flame. A hulking man; with huge arms, a boot camp haircut, grey and black camo pants, and an insane look in his eyes now stood where the robot had been. He was wielding a giant bazooka. He exclaimed, "BOOM BOOM! HA HA HA HA!" and ran off to cause more damage. The three exchanged dumbfounded expressions. "Who was that guy?" Shortstuff asked. "Someone I'd care not to cross again." Shadowwind replied. "Well, I'd sooner be behind the guy causing damage than the guy receiving it. Let's follow him." Chaos insisted. They took off after the crazy guy with the bazooka. He was easy to find, they just followed the explosions and maniacal laughter. He was pitching grenades baseball style into the barrels of the guns mounted on the tanks heading his direction. Every time something blew up, he would giggle with delight. This man really enjoyed his work. Chaos, Shadowwind, and Shortstuff kept a semi-safe distance away from him, but close enough so not to get blown up. Within ten minutes or so, it seemed the insanity was dying down. The crazy guy, though, was still doing as much damage as possible. Chaos decided he needed to get some information about where they were, so he silently walked up behind the brute and rendered him unconscious with a simple neck crank.  
  
When the brute woke up, he was bound to a chair in an abandoned building. One of the few left after the battle. He saw a strange short man with a scraggly beard, another with a ponytail, and a primitive projectile device. He then saw the figure in black with the black marks on his face. He spoke in an authoritative tone.  
  
"Okay, big guy. We need answers. To gonna talk?"  
  
"You guys don't scare me. I'll blow you to hell. Hehehehehehe."  
  
"Okay, let's try a different approach. Shadowwind, untie him."  
  
The elf released the hulk. Chaos spread his arms.  
  
"Okay, brute. You think you can take me? Here's your chance."  
  
The hulk pulled out a grenade and threw it at Chaos. Chaos merely caught it and waited. The explosion erupted around him. When the smoke cleared, there was Chaos still, just charred black and smoking. He coughed.  
  
"Still think you take me?"  
  
Chaos then threw the brute across the room. He slammed into the wall.  
  
"Now let's try this again. What's your name?"  
  
"Name's Boom Boom."  
  
"Well, that fits. Now Boom Boom, where are we?"  
  
"A Building."  
  
"I know that! What is this world?"  
  
"You don't know? This is Earth."  
  
"Earth? What year?"  
  
"2076."  
  
"So we're in the future. At least mine. Now what are you, Boom Boom?"  
  
"A Soldier. Special demolitions unit. At least I was. Some people seem to think a guy can't enjoy his work."  
  
"Hmmm.." Chaos turned to Dogmar and Shadowwind. "This guy could prove useful ." The elf and dwarf looked back with blank expressions.  
  
"What?"  
  
"We don't know what's out there, but this guy isn't afraid to blow it up."  
  
"Oh."  
  
Chaos turned back to Boom Boom. "Do you like being a soldier?"  
  
"I just like FIRE!" His expression dropped. "But no one likes me. They think I'm crazy!"  
  
"Would you like to go somewhere else?"  
  
"Where? This entire planet's a ruined shithole."  
  
"You don't have to stay here. We can take you somewhere where you can destroy all you like. You've just been transferred, soldier."  
  
"Yes, sir!"  
  
"Let's go, but watch out, the enemy is still everywhere."  
  
The quartet exited the building cautiously, Boom Boom leading with his bazooka armed and ready. Chaos leapt onto the roof of a building and surveyed the area. Shortstuff and Shadowwind stayed behind Boom Boom and looked around nervously. Chaos suddenly remembered something. He could travel to the void. He just didn't know if it would accommodate others. He leapt down in front of the trio below him.  
  
"I going to try something. Everyone gather close." The four clustered closely, and Chaos began to focus his power. This time, however, something was different. As the energy began to grow, he heard voices.  
  
-Oh no you don't, Chaos. You pulled it off once, but not again-  
  
-We can't allow you to run again, Sean. This much power is beyond our control-  
  
"We'll find out soon enough."  
  
"Not this time, son."  
  
"I will not allow you to escape again."  
  
You play with the big boys; you play by the big boys' rules.  
  
Chaos saw the shocked expressions on Shadowwind's, Dogmar's, and Boom Boom's faces and turned around. His face twisted with horror to see the Skull Cowboy, Raven, and Poe before him. They did not appear angry. They had the look of a schoolteacher who had seen kids making trouble a million times.  
  
"I gave you a chance. You turned it down. But I will not allow my birds to be taken."  
  
"They have a job to do, son."  
  
"It was your mistake to give me them. They're mine now. Boom Boom! Enemy soldiers!"  
  
Boom Boom's face lit up and he aimed his bazooka. "BOOM BOOM! HA HA HA!"  
  
Wouldn't recommend that, boy. Poe interjected.  
  
KABLAM! The Skull Cowboy, Raven, and Poe went flying back about fifty feet. They landed hard and started to get back up. Chaos wasted no time. He focused his power. He began to become energy. This time, however, he was racked with pain. Onyx and Jester were resisting him. Chaos screamed in agony.  
  
-You're not running with us again, Sean-  
  
-We are not yours-  
  
Chaos focused stronger. He sensed the Cowboy and Raven coming back after him. He expanded his essence to accommodate his party. The pain was excruciating. He thought of the void. His aura vanished along with the elf, dwarf, and soldier. They were entering the void. Chaos felt a rush of relief. But he was not in control this time. Jester and Onyx were at the wheel this time.  
  
-So, you like to hop around the multiverse, ay? Well, let's see how you like THIS little side trip-  
  
-Prepare yourself, Sean-  
  
The void enveloped the four, but they were floating not free like previous trips. They were being propelled  
  
with blinding speed toward a portal giving off a bright light. Shadowwind, Dogmar, and Boom Boom were  
  
screaming, but they could not be heard. In the void, there was no physical sound. Even Chaos was  
  
panicking. He was completely helpless to combat the path the crows had sent them on. Knowing what was  
  
to come, he braced himself for impact. The four entered the portal and saw a blue sky. They then realized  
  
that they were falling from it. The ground was coming at them incredibly fast. There were people standing  
  
all around below them. There was camera equipment set up. There was even a large cushion below them.  
  
Boom Boom, Shadowwind, and Shortstuff managed to adjust their fall to land on it, but Chaos just missed  
  
it, and landed face first on the concrete below. His broken body mended and he got up. Twenty people  
  
rushed to him. They looked horrified.  
  
"Mr. Collins! Mr. Collins! Are you okay? Get the medic crew!"  
  
Paramedics checked him and looked puzzled. "He's perfectly fine. Fall like that should have killed you, Mr. Collins." The other three got off the cushion and looked around. The other people went over to them.  
  
"Who are you? What roles are you doing? Did Mr. Collins bring you on?"  
  
Boom Boom, Shortstuff, and Shadowwind were about to brandish their weapons when Chaos shouted, "Yes! They're with me!" A man in sunglasses, holding a megaphone, got off a camera crane. He looked perturbed. "Sean! I'm the director! I authorize new actors in this picture! Where did you get these guys? Old classmates from acting school?" Chaos immediately blurted out, "Yeah." The director scratched his head. "And where did get a hold of a ninja suit? And what about these guys? What are they wearing? You sure you're okay, Sean?" Chaos started stuttering, "Uhhh.yeah.but that fall must of knocked something loose. I think I'd better go home for a while. And I'll take my school buds with me." The director nodded in agreement. "You'd best do that. You're getting really weird. You're not even supposed to be here today. I'll send for your limo. Just relax for while." A long black limousine pulled up outside the studio gates, and three security guards escorted Chaos, Shadowwind, Dogmar, and Boom Boom to the car. They attempted to take the weapons, believing they were props, but Chaos insisted that they belonged to him. The dumbfounded quartet piled into the car, which was a very tight squeeze for Boom Boom, and they took off down the road. Ten minutes later, the car came to stop in the driveway of a large mansion. The chauffeur opened the door and stated, "We're home, Mr. Collins. You and your friends can get out now. And I would recommend that you take it easy today. No wild orgies for a while." Chaos looked at him with confusion, and the car headed out of sight. At this point Shadowwind spoke up. "Chaos, what in the name of Corellon is going on? Why is everyone calling you Collins? And, WHERE are we?"  
  
Dogmar spouted, "What was that about orgies?"  
  
Boom Boom exhibited a nervous twitch. "When do I get to destroy something?"  
  
Chaos quieted everyone. "I don't know what's going on, either, but until we do, let's play along."  
  
They went up to the door and opened it. "Seanny!" Chaos was knocked flat on his back by a gorgeous woman. Her perfectly formed face was immaculately framed by her brown hair with blond highlights. She had a white mini-skirt and tight white t-shirt that showed off her captivating body. She kind of resembled Britney Spears. She kissed Chaos over and over, with her tongue, too. Chaos didn't know what to think of this turn of events, but he knew enough to leave it be. The other three stood with mouths gaping. Eventually the beauty got off, and Chaos regained his feet. "I thought you were supposed to be at the Teen Choice Awards, baby. You were nominated for Best Actor. They can't be over already." Finally, something Chaos knew about. "Uh, I didn't win. So I took off to be with you. I ran into a few friends of mine from acting school. This is Shadowwind, Dogmar Shortstuff, and Boom Boom. Those are screen names, just call them by those. They like it."  
  
"Oh okay. Hi, I'm.Seany, why don't you introduce me?"  
  
"It would more personal if you did it, baby."  
  
"Like, nice to meet you, I'm Alisa. I've never heard of you before. You must be from way back. You look kinda old to be knowing my Seany, Dogmar."  
  
Dogmar and Chaos hesitated for a moment, and Dogmar spoke up. "Uh, well, I was one of the older students there." "Yeah." Chaos chimed in. "He was more into the fight choreography, like me. Shadowwind was an expert on Shakespeare, and Boom Boom, uhhh, he was an instructor."  
  
"Mega Cool!" Alisa replied. "Baby, I haven't seen you in a week. We got some catching up to do." She started to caress his neck, sending shivers down Chaos' spine. He knew exactly what she meant. In his mortal life, he'd never had the opportunity. Even of Alisa did think he was a different him, he wasn't passing this up. First, he had to think of what to do with his party.  
  
"Uhh, Alisa?"  
  
Alisa looked at him strangely. "You always call me Ally! Why so formal?"  
  
Chaos rubbed his head. "Well, I took a nasty fall today. I don't feel quite all here."  
  
Ally looked very sympathetic. "You poor baby! I'll take care of you all you need."  
  
"But what about my buds? What are they gonna do?"  
  
"They can stay in the guest house."  
  
"Guest house?"  
  
"You musta really got hit hard, baby. The guest house in the backyard. The one you stay in on Friday nights." Chaos walked to a window and saw a rather large house directly behind the one he was in. He told Shadowwind to take the other two out there, and keep them from causing any mass destruction. He told them to stay the night there, and the next day, they would try to find a way out of this world. Shadowwind agreed and exited to the back. Chaos and Ally went up to the bedroom and had a Kama Sutra so intense, passionate, and downright acrobatic, that despite how perverted the author of this story is, it will not be printed here. When Ally fell asleep, Chaos started to look around the room for clues as to what this Sean Collins was like. There was a picture of Bruce Lee on the desk, along with a picture of Ally, but one drawer in the desk had a lock on it. He ripped the lock off and found something startling. He found a little black book and a mini calendar. The book was full of girls' numbers, and the calendar had every Friday marked with a name. "Sarah" "Kelly" "Melissa". He saw the name "Jennifer" marked on one day. He immediately looked for it in the book. Was Jennifer still alive? He saw there were three Jennifers in the book. None of them were Jennifer Grant. Chaos was shocked. What could have happened? Was Jennifer dead here, too, or had the other Sean lost her some other way? Then he saw the pictures. They were of him, screwing other girls. Some looked like they were sixteen years old. This Sean Collins was taking the celebrity life way too far. He thought to himself, "What happened to me here?"  
  
"Maybe I can answer that one for you, son."  
  
Chaos didn't even need to turn around to know who it was. "Is Raven with you?"  
  
6 "Not this time, he has other matters to attend to. What do think of this little reality, Chaos?"  
  
"What happened here?"  
  
"Well, in this world, you and Jennifer never died. Ryans and his boys never found you. You went on to make a big break in movies. You were like Bruce Lee, Jackie Chan, and Nicholas Cage rolled into one. You fought, acted, and did your own stunts. You were the most popular actor around. Especially around the girls. Jennifer stuck with you, but she wanted to get married and have a family. You loved your new life, and all the girls throwing themselves at you. You realized you didn't want what Jennifer wanted. You loved being a star and you never wanted it to end. She and you had a nasty breaking apart, and she's in a loveless marriage now. But you didn't care. You realized all these screaming fans wanted you, and you could have them. You met Alisa on the set of one your movies, and you were happy with her. She fucked like the energizer bunny, and she loved you. But, you loved the status you had, and every Friday night, you still fuck a fan of yours in your guesthouse. Every autograph session you have, you find a new one. You got real shallow, friend. You have a hottie in your bed, and material success, and you still screw teenagers, some only fifteen. Well, Alisa's eighteen, and your twenty-two now. You still so sure this is so great?"  
  
-You had to see this, Sean.-  
  
-Woo-Hoo, Chaos! You be da man! Get the pussy! You are one bad motha-  
  
-Shut your mouth! You had to know what you would have become if you had lived.-  
  
"You would have lost Jennifer anyway. I'm sorry."  
  
Chaos became so overwhelmed he slipped into Crow mode. "Where is the other me?"  
  
"Still at the Teen Choice Awards. But let it go. You thought you wouldn't have become what you are if you had lived. If anything, you're better off that you didn't. Jennifer doesn't hate you in your universe."  
  
"Doesn't hate.what do you mean?"  
  
"Jennifer isn't gone. She wasn't destroyed. She's in Hell. The Trinity lied to you."  
  
"Why?"  
  
"So you wouldn't go after her."  
  
-They didn't want you going down there-  
  
"Well, I am now. After I take care of something."  
  
-All right, buddy! Go in and get the girl! You just march straight into.what do you have to do?"  
  
"I going to make me suffer."  
  
-Huh?-  
  
"The other Sean has caused a lot of pain. He's going to feel it."  
  
7 "Wait a minute there. You want to make YOURSELF suffer?"  
  
"I can't suffer anymore than I have. The other me doesn't feel a shred of remorse at all. I'm gonna make him. He's become arrogant. I'll put a stop to it. But could I bring Ally with me when I leave here?"  
  
"No."  
  
"Shit."  
  
Chaos went to the guesthouse to collect his partners. Boom Boom and Dogmar were unconscious in a puddle of wine and champagne. Shadowwind was watching TV with fascination. "This box talks to me." Chaos told him to gather the weaponry. They had a mission to perform. Shadowwind pointed outside. "I took away Boom Boom's weapons. They're out there." There was a pile five feet tall of guns and bombs. Shadowwind shrugged. "Don't ask. I couldn't figure it out either." The other two were wakened and told to come along. "We have a target. I have to take him alone. I need you to get me inside and take out any resistance."  
  
"Do I get to destroy something?"  
  
"Count on it, Boom Boom."  
  
"YEAH!"  
  
The Skull Cowboy was standing outside the guesthouse waiting. The other drew their weapons, but Chaos stopped them. The Cowboy sighed.  
  
"I don't agree with this, but if you're going to do this, I'll make it a little easier for you."  
  
His hand began to glow and he aimed it at the four. A mist enveloped them, and when it dispersed, they were standing on the roof of a concert hall. Chaos quickly formulated a plan. He told Boom Boom to find a car to blow up, then disappear. Shadowwind would open the entrance, and Dogmar would take out the security. If anyone showed up with weapons, Boom Boom was to handle them. Shadowwind could shoot some, but do not engage in melee combat. All these things set out; they set their plan into action. Boom Boom destroyed a limo sitting in the back, and when the security went to inspect it, Shadowwind opened the locked door. Chaos silently slipped inside. He stuck to the shadows where he was almost invisible. He worked his way to the backstage area and stood out of sight. He saw himself take the stage in acceptance for the best actor award. He could see the smugness in his other's face. The females were screaming wildly, and Chaos felt a bit of contempt. This Sean had achieved what had eluded him in his life. Then he remembered what this one had done with it. He strode onto the stage and everything stopped dead. The other Sean turned around and his jaw dropped when he saw himself. Chaos wasted no words and grasped his double's head, and as he had done to Tom Ryans, pain exploded in Sean's being. He felt the heartbreak he had caused in so many. All the pain he had caused others came rushing into his being. Chaos released Sean and watched him fall. Then he felt a bullet rip through his back. He shook it off and got back up. He was about to kill the guard that had shot him, when an arrow pierced the guard's skull. Chaos looked up and saw Shadowwind positioned in the rafters above. He was about to ask how he got up there, but decided just to escape. Police were starting to arrive, and Boom Boom was having a field day blowing up the squad cars. Dogmar was going berserk, cutting the legs off of the security guards. Chaos and Shadowwind collected their fellow combatants and fled out the back door, carrying Dogmar so he wouldn't run back into the fray, and Boom Boom threw a few hand grenades behind, collapsing the hallway behind them. They continued running, and saw a cemetery up ahead on the road. They figured no one would look for them there, so they ran inside. They slipped behind one of the larger tombs and collected their bearings.  
  
Shadowwind asked Chaos. "That guy looked just like you. What was going on?"  
  
Chaos replied calmly. "That was me. We're in an alternate timeline for my world. I am evil here."  
  
Shadowwind thought about how Chaos had been as long as he had known him, but said nothing.  
  
Chaos started to relax when he felt a strong spiritual presence. It stank of evil. He reverted to Crow and stood up. He listened closely. He heard strange words.  
  
"Nee an deru ta! Cro man yon! Cro man yon! Hecate! Thou art summoned!"  
  
Chaos peeked around the tomb and saw five kids in their early twenties standing on the far side of the cemetery. They wore all black, had piercings, and had pendants around their necks. There was an attractive high school aged girl tied to a stone altar. She looked high on something. The one chanting held a ceremonial dagger above the girl, and looked prepared to use it. Chaos beckoned for the rest to follow him. Chaos slid silently from shadow to shadow and crept behind the group of necromancers. As the leader was finishing his chant, Chaos leapt into the scene and tackled the kid, did a front handspring and popped up to his feet. He looked around at the rest. "Shouldn't be calling on things you don't understand. Can be very dangerous. Come on out boys." The five stood in shock when the dark figure called out what looked like an elf with twin swords, a dwarf with a nasty battle axe, and a HUGE guy with a missile launcher. They pulled their handguns and pocketknives in a feeble attempt to put up a fight.  
  
The warriors smirked at this. Then something unexpected happened. The unfinished chant had opened a portal to the nether regions, but made it very unstable. A moonbeam struck the ground, and where it struck, the ground split apart. A hole of fire gaped and began to pull. The young necromancers were immediately pulled in, but the captive girl was safely tied down, and was secure. Chaos, Shortstuff, Shadowwind, and Boom Boom tried to hold on to something, but to no avail. They were also pulled into the passage to Hell.  
  
The four were falling down a tunnel of pure fire. Shadowwind and Dogmar were holding onto each other, and Boom Boom was cheering. "YEEEEEEEEEHAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!" The brute screamed on the way down. Chaos could only think of one thing.  
  
"Ahh, shit."  
  
-I don't believe that this is good thing for you, dude. Didn't you fight AGAINST this place once?-  
  
"Shut up, Jester."  
  
-Ha Ha! I know something you don't know!-  
  
"What?"  
  
-There's a surprise ahead, Sean. Something you would never expect-  
  
"And you're both just going to not tell me, aren't you."  
  
Before either Crow could answer, the descent ended. Instead of a huge crash as usual, the trip ended with a gentle plop. Chaos looked around. He was in a church. But it was empty save him. There was cross hanging from behind the main altar. But it was covered in blood. Chaos looked behind him. The building seemed to go on forever. He was sitting in a pew right in front of the altar. Then he saw the other figure. The other turned to face him. He had short black hair, well built, and was wearing a priest's garb. He walked down to where Chaos was sitting and sat down beside him.  
  
"Hello, my son. I am Joshua Cord. I am here to help you on your way to the afterlife."  
  
"Wait. Have you seen an elf, dwarf, and a really big guy come through he.what did you say your name was?"  
  
"Yes, I sent them on at least an hour ago. My task is to.why do you ask?"  
  
-Told you-  
  
"Cord, were you ever a Crow?"  
  
"Why, yes, and I was sent here after it. How could you know?"  
  
Chaos slipped to Crow, and Cord stood up, shocked.  
  
"What? You don't stay a Crow after it's done!"  
  
"I didn't, but things have changed for me. Do you know where you are?"  
  
"I'm in the Church of Transition. I help souls move on to Heaven."  
  
"Wrong, Cord. You're in Hell. Your god fucked you over just like he did me."  
  
"That's not possible!"  
  
Chaos beckoned to a door at the side of the church. "Have you ever looked outside?"  
  
"No. I just send the souls through and wait for new ones."  
  
"Look."  
  
Cord opened the door and peered outside. He leaped back with a gasp. The church was at the edge of Purgatory. There was fire erupting everywhere, and demons ran abundantly about. Cord slammed the door shut.  
  
"I've been living a lie."  
  
"Just like everyone else. You were used to give the souls false hope, so they could be tormented even more. How's it feel to be used?"  
  
"What do I do now?"  
  
"Don't know."  
  
-I do! Finally, I get out of this prison!-  
  
Chaos felt like he was being ripped apart. He dropped to his knees and a bolt of black lightning escaped from his body, and struck Cord. He fell to the ground, and screamed in pain. When Cord arose, he bore the marks of the Crow, and his eyes were pure red.  
  
-Looks like it's just you and me, Sean-  
  
Chaos felt significantly weaker, but he was still a Crow. Now Cord was again. He looked himself over, then removed the priest's robes. Chaos smiled.  
  
"Welcome back."  
  
"Feels good to be back."  
  
"I've got some others who came with me. You know where you sent them?"  
  
"Through the door. After that, who knows."  
  
Suddenly there was a huge BOOM and maniacal laughter. Chaos smiled again.  
  
"Looks like they didn't get very far."  
  
Chaos and Cord left the church to the scene of massacre. Boom Boom was destroying everything in sight, and Dogmar was assaulting anything that came near him. Shadowwind was once again like a tornado, spinning through the fray with complete grace. Chaos tapped Cord on the shoulder.  
  
"If you want vengeance, here's the place to start."  
  
The two Crows leapt into the battle. Chaos immediately attacked a large death knight wielding a huge black sword. Chaos took the sword and beheaded the demon. Cord similarly ripped another demon's throat out and took his scimitar. All five were armed now. The battle seemed to be turning in their favor. Then a loud roar erupted from the opposing side. A huge bugbear entered the fray. Both Dogmar and Chaos recognized it. Hruggek was back.  
  
This was Hell, so he wouldn't be as easy this time. Chaos readied his blade. The Bugbear God beckoned to him. "You are in my world, now, fool!" He hefted his axe prepared to cleave Chaos' skull. Chaos closed the gap quickly and rammed the blade into Hruggek's gut. The blade began to glow, and the bugbear started to convulse. Chaos struggled to control the blade, and the bugbear's essence was absorbed by the sword. There was only an empty husk. Chaos looked at the sword in confusion. "What the hell is this?"  
  
-Don't worry about it now, Sean. Just fight-  
  
Chaos continued on his rampage, and every creature he touched with blade was instantly reduced to an empty corpse. Every time he slew, Chaos also felt slightly stronger. Cord was doing all right, but he was rather clumsy with the scimitar. Boom Boom was lobbing countless hand grenades into the horde of hell spawn that opposed them. The other four had to stop for a moment and wonder, "Where is he getting those things?" The black blade is Chaos' hand began to hum, and Chaos felt the need to kill more. He resisted it though, and managed to force the blade into his belt and leave it there. The horde of demons was retreating, terrified by the explosions going off all around them. The quintet let up a victory cry, save Chaos and Cord, who were still contemplating their new situations. Cord was a Crow again, and he had been lied to and cast to Hell. Chaos' new blade contained immense power, but there was something very wrong about it. It seemed to have a mind of it's own. But it had served him well, so he decided to keep it for a while longer. Cord was swinging his scimitar, testing it, getting his feel. The other three joined them.  
  
Shadowwind asked, "Well, what do we do now?" Chaos looked around the area. It seemed to stretch on forever in all directions. There was nothing but fiery wasteland as far as he could see. But he had a purpose here. He turned to the group.  
  
"We find Jennifer."  
  
"You may not like what you find."  
  
Chaos turned slowly around and saw Raven standing before him. The group prepared to fight, but Raven raised his hand.  
  
"I am not here for battle, nor to collect you, Chaos. On the contrary, you have impressed me. No one has ever eluded me so well. Or resurrected another Crow. Greetings, Cord."  
  
Haven't seen you around for a while. Poe screeched from Raven's shoulder.  
  
Cord was confused. "Who are you?"  
  
"The first of what you are. Before any Crow returned to their world, I was sent back."  
  
The great-granddaddy of all Crows, Cord.  
  
Chaos spoke up. "Well, then, what do you want?"  
  
"I am not here for you, Chaos. You stumbled into my home realm. I live in Hell. But I can tell you that searching for Jennifer will only bring more suffering upon you."  
  
"I don't care. I can't suffer any more then I already have."  
  
"I once thought that, too. Very well, seek your lost love if you wish." With that, Raven polymorphed into a bird and flew off with Poe.  
  
Everyone stood stunned as the pair flew away. This had been their hunter, and had tracked them across worlds, and now he was just going. Chaos shrugged.  
  
"Good riddance. Let's go. We've got somebody to find!"  
  
The rest didn't know what else to do, so they went with him.  
  
They trekked across what seemed to be endless terrain, seeing tortured souls and demon tormentors at every turn. Cord wanted to help them, but Chaos held him back.  
  
"Those people are here because they earned their passage. There's only here one who deserves to be on high. And we're going to find her."  
  
Cord was appalled at this. "How can you be so unfeeling?"  
  
"Live and learn, Cord. Or in my case, UNLIVE and learn. You've been locked in your cathedral, helping those who you thought where good. Well, WAKE UP, Cord! You were a Crow once! You had vengeance! Do you remember that?"  
  
Cord's mind flashed back to when he and Jester had returned to avenge his murder. He then understood.  
  
-That's right, Sunny Jim. The cranky piss-ass is correctumundo. The real world sucks, but you can still have fun. That is, if you're willing-  
  
Cord gripped the scimitar tighter. He realized just what kind of world he living in. He looked around. He watched the souls of murderers, rapists, and people who drove slow in the fast lane. He saw their suffering. He thought what torment they must have inflected in their lives. Particularly the slow drivers. A coldness seemed to grow over him. He looked at Chaos, and his eyes of bright red seemed to glow a little dimmer.  
  
"Let's find your lady friend."  
  
The quintet moved on through the bowels of Hell. They moved deeper and deeper, occasionally fighting off any who would stand in their way. They moved deeper and deeper into the bowels. They saw progressively more gruesome punishments, and beings that were indescribable. Within time, they approached what was the center of the domain. The Palace of Satan. Chaos and Cord become nauseated with the stench of evil permeating from the breathtaking structure. It towered so high no one could see where it ended. The towers were of magnificent construct, and were pure black. There were figures of weeping angels and laughing devils mounted from the walls. The walls were not of stone, but of glistening black metal, perfectly smooth. The gates were pure red, and had no handles on them. The masks of Comedy and Tragedy were imprinted into the door. The building was without flaw, a towering monument to Order in this land of Chaos. Strangely, there were no guards about. There was no way to scale the walls, so the only option was the main entrance. Boom Boom took aim and fired. When the smoke cleared, the gate still stood. Dogmar exclaimed, "Well, NOW what! We've been gallivanting across Hell for who knows how long, trying to find some girl that probably isn't even here! What are we wasting our time here fo." The gate opened slowly, and seemed to almost say, "Please enter." The quintet drew their weapons and headed toward the gate. The black blade in Chaos' hands seemed to be quivering with anxiety. They moved through the single hallway toward who knew what. There was still no one about. The only sounds were the faint humming of the black blade, and a quiet chuckle coming from Boom Boom. The passage seemed to have no end. It went on beyond sight. Finally, Shadowwind spoke, "Does this ever end?" With that a bright flash enveloped the hallway, and the five found themselves standing a huge chamber. The smooth walls were without blemish, and a staircase rose at least twenty feet up. The stairs were blood red, and led to a huge throne at the top. This was made of pure gold, and was adorned with  
  
crystals of varying colors. Some flashed from color to color, while others stayed consistent. Some were very dim, and had no shine. Three vultures with glowing red eyes were perched atop the throne. Something in a shadow was seated in it, but it could not be seen. The black blade started to audibly hum, and emanated a black aura around it. The shadowy figure stood up and spoke.  
  
"The Black Blade.How did you come by that?"  
  
Chaos retorted defiantly, "Come down and maybe I'll tell you."  
  
"Very well." The figure descended from his chair and glided down the stairs. Cord's jaw dropped when he saw what stood before him. The figure was a Negro human, dressed like British royalty. He spoke with elegance and intelligence. He was tall, but not too large. Maybe 160 pounds. He eyed the sword with curiosity. "All right, I'm here. Now, how did you get it?"  
  
"I took it."  
  
"Took it? My main gatekeeper wielded.oh, I think I see. You're Chaos, aren't you? Yes, I thought you had arrived. I have something you may want, sir."  
  
"I don't have time for this. Now, where's Satan?"  
  
"Why, you insult me, Chaos. Don't recognize me when I'm standing in front of you? Don't believe scripture. It's all lies that were written by that Trinity. Gee, show the slightest hint of free will and they boot you out. You know all about that, don't you?"  
  
Boom Boom fired a missile at Satan, and he nonchalantly waved his hand. The shell disintegrated into dust. He waved again, and Boom Boom went flying into the wall.  
  
"Please, I am in the middle of an important conversation right now, thank you."  
  
Dogmar, Shadowwind, and Cord looked contemptuous, but wary. They kept their distance.  
  
Satan turned back to Chaos, who was still holding the sword in front of him.  
  
"Would you like to see what I have?"  
  
Chaos spoke slowly and cautiously. "Show me."  
  
Satan smiled broadly. "Excellent! Oh Precious! Come down and see who's here!"  
  
A sound that sounded human and not human came from near the throne, and a woman came walking groggily down the stairs. Chaos started to shudder uncontrollably. This being, while ragged almost beyond recognition, was Jennifer. She was stark naked, her hair was a mess, and she had scars all over her body. Chaos felt a rush of fury. "YOU FUCKING BASTARD! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO HER!"  
  
Satan smirked and shrugged. "So I treat my toys a little rough. Had to use my best drugs and magic on this one. Now she doesn't know up from down." Satan face flashed to that of a red devil, and reverted back. "My, My, but I've seen what you've done in alternate realities. For shame, my friend. But for this little pastry, I'd cross Hell, too. Oh, what am I saying? I do it every day. Hehehehehe." Jennifer licked Satan's face. Raven's words came flooding back into Chaos' mind. "You will suffer more than you ever could anticipate." Chaos shed a single tear of black blood. Satan then dropped his pants and started to fuck Jennifer right in front of him. Chaos fell to the ground and wept like he had never known he could. He curled up and a ball and started screaming. "STOP STOP STOP STOP!" Satan pulled out and laughed loudly at the sight of the mighty Crow crying like a baby. Jennifer looked at Chaos strangely. Dogmar couldn't stand the sight of this anymore and leapt at Satan and clamped down hard with his teeth, right on his genitals. "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"  
  
Shadowwind drew his twin blades and began to hack at the demon. Cord joined the battle and flailed wildly at Satan. The three vultures took flight and started to dive at them. Boom Boom took aim and fired at the birds. They went up in balls of fire. The other three turned Satan into diced cheese, while he covered his face and screamed in agony as his was repeatedly lacerated. Shortstuff let go of his crotch, wound up his axe, and let loose a mighty swing. The blade cut deep into Satan's abdomen, and he fell to the ground. Boom Boom pulled out yet another hand grenade and stuffed into Satan's mouth. Chaos looked up to see the carnage, grabbed Jennifer; who was kicking, screaming, and clawing, and hauled ass for cover. The only way to go was up the stairs to the throne. They all ducked behind it, and Chaos had to restrain Jennifer who was starting to bite him. The explosion sent unnamable bodily parts flying all over the chamber. Shadowwind looked up and saw a large black spot on the floor. "Uhh, guys? I think we just killed Satan. Who was Satan anyway?" Cord spoke solemnly. "The source of all evil. At least I thought so. There's a lot more out there, I see."  
  
"NNNNNOOOOO!!!!" Jennifer screamed. "You killed him, you sons of bitches!" Chaos finally had no choice but to choke her out so they could think. Then he noticed the crystals embedded in the throne. Each one contained a being of some sort. Some human, some alien. All appeared to be in torment. Some showed great rage, and their crystal flashed colors. Others were very weary, and their crystals were dim. Still others appeared to be dead, and their crystals had no color at all.  
  
-Souls, Sean. Everyone who comes to Hell ends up somewhere- Onyx spoke to him.  
  
"Well, now what?" Dogmar said.  
  
Chaos shrugged. "I don't know. I don't see any way out of this room."  
  
"Allow me." Raven appeared behind them. "Nice work. But it's not permanent. No mortal weapon can slay him. I see you found Jennifer, Chaos. I told you you wouldn't like what you saw."  
  
"Skip the rubbing in part. Just get us out of here."  
  
Mists arose around the party, and they vanished. They found themselves outside the palace. Chaos touched Raven's shoulder. "All right, talk. You know a lot more than you let on, Raven."  
  
"Are you sure you want to know?"  
  
"YES, GOD DAMN IT!"  
  
"All right." Everyone sat down and rested for a while. "When Hell's minions attacked, it appeared that Jennifer was destroyed. As you know, that was not so. When she was brought back with the rest of the souls that had been taken, they were brought before Satan. The rest of them were locked in those soul crystals you were admiring so much. But Jennifer was different. She was a challenge. And Old Scratch loves a challenge. She put up a good fight for a while, then he got smart. He got her addicted to his best drugs, and turned her into a harem junkie. He told her things that only the two of you knew, by probing her mind. She was so easy to read, but she's always been a little gullible, ay? He wore her down and broke her. Then when he took her body, to put it bluntly, he had her. There is nothing left of the Jennifer you knew. She belongs to Satan."  
  
Chaos looked at Jennifer's unconscious body, and he shed another tear of blood. His entire reason for being was gone, for the third time. "Nothing can done to help her?"  
  
"Nothing that I am aware of."  
  
"Well, I'll find out for myself. I'm taking her back to Heaven."  
  
"You will never find a way in."  
  
"You underestimate me."  
  
Just then a deafening roar sounded from inside the palace. The roof split apart, and Satan reemerged, in all his full glory. He now stood fifty feet tall, bulged muscles, had red scales, black horns, and huge wings. He spotted the party, roared again, and took flight. Everyone took off running and tried to get someplace to hide. Boom Boom was backpeddling and firing at everything in sight to slow down the winged demon. Satan just burst through everything and continued onward. "Shit!" Boom Boom exclaimed. Suddenly, Raven stopped the group. "Wait." He said.  
  
"Are you insane! He's right behind us!"  
  
"Wait." A black cloud was starting to form in the sky. Satan, blinded by fury, did not notice it. As he spotted the party again, he reared up to make his attack. He was cut short, however, when millions upon millions of crows began flooding from the cloud. They began to swarm around Satan. Poe flew out of the cloud, joined by the Skull Cowboy, riding a huge Crow. The army of birds pecked and clawed at Satan.  
  
Raven reached out to Chaos and Cord. "Come. They will need your power as well." They leapt up to where Satan was thrashing at the birds. They landed on his back. "You know what to do." Chaos and Cord nodded. The trio concentrated their energy, and placed their hands on Satan's head. The demon roared in pain, as all the pain he had inflicted came rushing into his being. Raven drew the Black Blade  
  
from Chaos' belt and raised it high. "I never liked you anyway." He then plunged it into Satan's skull, and the blade made a loud screech, and glowed brighter than the sun. It started to drain the demon's essence. Raven was holding on, trying to control it's power, but he was unable to have any control. The sword began to shake violently, and Satan's body was drained to that of a husk. The withered corpse fell to the ground. The crows, their job done, flew back into the cloud and disappeared.  
  
Raven dropped the sword, which was now glowing like a nuclear reactor, and fell to the ground. Chaos and Cord lifted him back his feet. The Skull Cowboy and Poe landed next to them. "Looks like you've been challenging the system, boss." "It was the time." Didn't think you had it in you. Poe remarked.  
  
Shadowwind and Dogmar stepped up to the group. "Well, that was fun, but can we go now?", Shadowwind remarked. Chaos looked around at the withered body and Satan and the destruction all around, and sighed. "Yeah, let's get out of here. Wait a minute. Where's Boom Boom?" The brute had vanished. Then the Black Blade began to make a high-pitched scream and started to shake. Raven looked at it in horror. "The sword is holding too much power. It will not contain it much longer. We have to escape now." The sword shattered and essences started to pour from the shards. One of them started to flow back into Satan body. It started to rise. The Skull Cowboy exclaimed, "He's coming back! Let's haul undead ass!" "But what about Boom Boom?" "Never mind him! He can handle himself!" Satan took flight again, and this time he was ready for them. He sent out a call to battle, and every demon in Hell responded. The party was flanked on all sides by hellspawn, and they were prepared for battle. Everyone drew their weapons and prepared to go down. Jennifer even woke up and started scratching Chaos' face. He did not need to deal with that now. He back handed her and left her unconscious in the middle of their circle. The armies were closing in. Hruggek had his soul back and was leading his pack of bugbears, aching for blood. Chaos was now unarmed, as were Raven and the Skull Cowboy. Chaos thought for moment, "Where the hell is Boom Boom?" His thoughts were answered by a huge explosion, leaving a gaping hole in the closing forces. Boom Boom charged through the flames, sporting twin bazookas in his hands, firing at everything in sight. "Shit, people! I leave to take a piss and you start a fight without me! Nukes away!" Boom Boom started laughing maniacally and launched missile after missile into the hordes, and Shadowwind and Dogmar followed in image, rushing into the forces, the elf with twin blades, and the dwarf with six-foot broadsword. Poe started swooping above, blasting with fire from his eyes. Cord similarly dove in with his scimitar. The other three had to attack and steal blades from others. Chaos stayed behind, and only attacked those who came to close to Jennifer. Satan flew overhead and beckoned to Chaos.  
  
"You have stolen my treasure! You will suffer eternally!" Chaos held his ground and waited for the descent. Satan reared up to dive, and was struck in the eye by a golden arrow. Chaos looked with confusion to where it had come from. A white portal was hovering in the air, and archangels were pouring out. Chaos recognized most of them, and he saw Michael leading the charge. He had no clue how or why they were here, but they had supplied him with an escape. He scooped up Jennifer and made flying leap to the portal. He called to the rest of his party. "Move out, guys! We're outta here!" Shadowwind and Dogmar , as well as Cord, made a break through the forces and likewise ran for the portal. Raven, Poe, and The Skull Cowboy were not following, though. They saw the archangels and made a break in the opposite direction. The angelic army made its assault on the demons, and a faction went straight for Satan. Chaos saw that no one even noticed four of them amidst the war. Then he realized something. "Where's Boom Boom?" He scanned the area, and saw Boom Boom doing a one man Conga line through the carnage, throwing grenades in all directions.  
  
"BOOM BOOM! GET UP HERE!"  
  
"Awww.just when it was it getting good!"  
  
He produced a neutron detonator from his arsenal and set the timer. Chaos looked at it in horror.  
  
"Boom Boom! You'll destroy everything, including the ang.set it off, man!" Boom Boom pointed his bazooka at the ground and fired, propelling him toward the white portal, and knocking everybody inside. They started flying down a dark tunnel with a light at the end. Chaos then realized what was in store for them there. "Oh, mega shit."  
  
They ascended in front of a pair of golden gates with an old man standing behind a podium of some sort, dressed in golden robes. He looked at the strange band in front of him, and raised an eyebrow. "Hello. I am Saint Peter. Names please."  
  
"Chaos and company."  
  
"WHAT! Chaos! You were banished forever! Get out of here right now or I'll call the archangels!"  
  
"Your archangels are doing battle in the bowels of Hell. And they're going to be very toasty soon. Now open the gates."  
  
"I.I can't do that."  
  
"Boom Boom. Tear his arms off."  
  
"Oh, go right in. Enjoy your stay in Paradise."  
  
"Don't intend to."  
  
The five ragged warriors strode through the gates into Heaven. Chaos knew right where he needed to go, and went straight for the center of the realm. The House of the Trinity. They strode forcefully into the Council of Divinity's chamber. He lay Jennifer on the floor before them.  
  
-CHAOS! YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO BE HERE! AND WHO ARE THESE WRETCHED CREATURES?-  
  
"This "wretched creature" is Jennifer, who you said was destroyed. The rest are my true companions. Joshua Cord, come forward." Cord stepped forward. "I thought you were benevolent. You sent me to Hell!"  
  
-YOU KILLED GOD-FEARING MEN IN YOUR REQUITAL-  
  
"LIKE HELL I DID! YOU PUNISHED ME FOR TAKING JUSTICE! YOU LIED TO ME!"  
  
-YOUR TONE WILL NOT BE TOLERATED!-  
  
"Yes it will. This time, you will listen."  
  
Raven, Poe, and the Skull Cowboy stepped in the door. Raven was holding the Black Blade. "It seems this blade is more resilient than previously anticipated." Raven held the sword over his head and pointed it at the Trinity. The Skull Cowboy stepped forward. "We do more for mortals than you ever did. Oh sure, you could, but all the blind masses worshiping you alone and killing in your name went to your head, huh?"  
  
It's mutiny time, shitface. Poe screeched.  
  
-THIS IS AN OUTRAGE! YOU WILL ALL SUFFER FOR THIS! CHAOS! HELP ME!-  
  
"Oh no."  
  
Chaos was confused. "Chaos? Isn't that."  
  
"Not you. The real Chaos. The primal force all existence came from."  
  
All became very dark. Everything seemed to dissolve. Heaven melted away, and everything became void. No one could see, hear, or feel anything, but they sensed that the void ITSELF was breathing. The Trinity had disappeared. Jennifer was gone. The rest floated in nothing. Then the nothing made a noise. A low growl came from the void. One huge orb appeared in the space. It glowed orange, and had a red iris, with a pure black pupil. The eye looked directly at the party. It pulsated for an instant, then raging winds began to blow from all sides. Boom Boom, Dogmar, and Shadowwind were blown off into space, Cord tried to hold on to the Skull Cowboy, but they both were blown away. Raven and Poe held their ground for a few seconds, but were likewise disposed of. The Black Blade flew from Raven's grasp, and Chaos caught it, and by some strange impulse, thrust it beneath him. It stuck in the void, and the space made a tiny grunt. Chaos held the sword fast. The winds became even stronger, and threatened to rip him apart. Chaos could not hold on any longer.  
  
-Sean, pierce the eye-  
  
With a last desperate motion, he flung the sword at the bottomless iris. The sword flew straight and true, and Chaos held on to it. He flew straight into the eye, and instead of piercing anything, he flew right through it.  
  
There was a brilliant flash, and loud crash. Then there was nothing. Chaos found himself in an endless white landscape, with no sound or sensation. Chaos looked down at himself, and he saw nothing. He WAS the endless landscape. He thought, "Where am I?" but instead of thought, manifestation occurred. The empty white was filled with stars, planets, galaxies, and universes. Chaos could feel all the life in the multiverse. All their thoughts, all their dreams. Their happiness and sorrow. He thought, "It's too much, how can I feel so many?" At once all the life in the multiverse paraded all around him, and it was all him! Chaos saw himself in everything that existed. Living, nonliving, and undecided. Then Chaos thought, "Jennifer.", and he was rocketed back to the Council of Divinity's chamber. Jennifer was still there, unconscious in a heap. The rest had returned as well. Dogmar, Shadowwind, Dogmar, Cord, Raven, Poe, and The Skull Cowboy were there as well. They looked very disoriented. The Trinity looked upon Chaos with a hint of fear.  
  
-WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?-  
  
Chaos smiled slyly. "I broke through your lies. You are NOT the be all, end all. You are no better than me or that raggedy bag of bones behind me."  
  
"Hey."  
  
"Sorry. So. GOD. You've got serious charges to face. You blinded endless generations to your ways, and I know the Truth. And you can't stop me from spreading it."  
  
-NOOOOOOO!!!!!!-  
  
The Trinity gathered its power. A great light appeared above its head. Chaos stood his ground. He turned to the rest. "Go."  
  
The party exited the chamber. Jennifer remained.  
  
-DARK ONE! YOU WILL NEVER RETURN FROM WHERE I WILL SEND YOU THIS TIME!-  
  
"Uh huh."  
  
The Trinity hurled the light at Chaos. Chaos raised the Black Blade. He whispered to himself. "I am everything."  
  
-Excellent, Sean-  
  
The light met the Blade, and the glow overtook Chaos. Instead of vanishing, the glow focused itself in the Blade. "So, you think you think you can send me away from myself, ay?" Chaos spun around and flung the light back at the Trinity. The glow overtook it and it disappeared. Chaos was left alone in the room with Jennifer. The Black Blade seemed to hum with satisfaction. Chaos bent down to see if Jennifer was all right. "Jennifer?" He asked gently. She woke up and looked at him. "Sean? Is it you?" she said wearily.  
  
"Yeah baby, it's me."  
  
"You've got those weird marks again. I thought that was over."  
  
"It is now. We'll be together forever now."  
  
"Oh, Sean! I love you!"  
  
They embraced for the first in what seemed like an eternity. They had perfect bliss. Chaos had found happiness again. Then the Black Blade began to throb in his hand. Chaos tried to control it, but it was too strong. Chaos pushed Jennifer away to keep her away from the sword. But the sword attacked of its own accord, and impaled Jennifer. He could feel it draining her essence.  
  
"NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"  
  
Chaos was left holding the Black Blade, and Jennifer was gone. The rest of the party rushed back into the chamber and saw Chaos standing alone. Raven looked at the Black Blade and sighed.  
  
"I told you you would suffer more, Chaos."  
  
"WHY DID IT DO THAT! WHY?"  
  
"I don't know much about that blade. Only that it thinks for itself."  
  
"I can get her back! It released souls before!"  
  
"Do you have any idea how many souls you'll have to take before that will break again? Besides, I'm not sure you could handle it."  
  
"And why not?"  
  
Raven turned the Skull Cowboy and slugged him in the stomach. The Skull Cowboy slumped over in pain, and Chaos did the same.  
  
"You see? You're at one with all things now. You feel EVERYONE'S pain. Will you endure that, slay that many, to release one? And in doing so, you will release all the others in there as well, most likely evil beings, knowing you."  
  
"I don't care."  
  
"Thought so." Raven called everyone to gather close. "No need for the rest of your comrades to join your suffering. Skull Cowboy, return them to their realms."  
  
"All right kiddies, climb aboard. I'm your one-way ticket to your native lands. Step right up."  
  
Shadowwind gave Chaos a firm handshake of friendship. "I wish I could help you, Chaos. May the Fates be kind to you wherever you may roam." Dogmar Shortstuff punched Chaos in the stomach. "We'll always have a spare mug of ale for ya." Chaos smacked him upside the head. Dogmar grinned. "That's the spirit!" Boom Boom nearly crushed Chaos with a huge bear hug. "Don't forget. Never leave anything identifiable." Chaos grinned. "Don't you worry. I won't."  
  
"Hurry up, kids. The boat is departing." Raven called Cord and Chaos to him. He placed his hands on their chests, and they began to glow black. At once, Onyx and Jester were freed. They flew around the room and settled on Raven's shoulders. Cord was normal, but Chaos saw he still bore the marks of the Crow. Raven went to Cord. "Well, Cord. Where do you wish to go?"  
  
"I'll stay here. I worked hard enough to get here."  
  
"Then be off."  
  
Cord went his way into the city of Heaven.  
  
-Oh I just HATE goodbyes! There's always so depressing!-  
  
-Shut up, Jester-  
  
-Well, I guess weren't as big a piss ass as I thought, Chaos-  
  
"Thanks, I think."  
  
-Fare thee well, Sean-  
  
The two Crows flew to The Skull Cowboy. "Grand Central Station, Uhhh.Infinity trip destined for.a whole bunch of places!" A mist enveloped them and they disappeared. There was only Chaos and Raven. "Well, now what?"  
  
"I have an idea. I know somewhere you can go and complete what you wish to do. Would you return to Ravenloft?"  
  
"I guess, why?"  
  
"That place is overrun with evil. Prime meat for the Black Blade. Be beware. That DeathKnight that wielded it before you was corrupted by it in life. It is a strong force. It will be your greatest ally and your greatest enemy. "  
  
"All right, let's go then."  
  
Raven placed his hand on Chaos and a mist surrounded them. When it cleared they were standing outside a Renaissance style town. Raven explained to him what Ravenloft really was. "This place was created as a place of torment for the evil. I am the personification of Guilt, after all. The Dark Powers run this place. I hold a minor place among them. Satan holds a much higher rank, but he has ego problems. That is why I rebelled against him. Now I must stay out of Hell. This place is full of pain, however. Pain you will feel. You may learn to control it, in time. This is where you can collect your souls, is you wish to do so."  
  
"Hold up. Why am I still a Crow without Onyx?"  
  
"Well, I can't have you dying before you release Jennifer. You are immortal now. Do with it what you will."  
  
"Thank you, Raven."  
  
"You impressed me, Chaos. Only one other attempted to run from me, and he returned with a higher status."  
  
"The Skull Cowboy."  
  
"Yes. Who he was before that has been lost to time. Just as who I once was is forgotten even by me."  
  
"I'm sorry."  
  
"Don't be. Goodbye, Chaos."  
  
"I'm not Chaos. I'm not Sean Collins either. They were only fragments of the Whole. I am one. The Dark One."  
  
"Farewell, Dark One." Raven vanished into the shadows. The Dark One was left alone. But he was not alone. He was All. He set forth into a world that was familiar and new all at once. He proceeded into the town. At once he felt nerve racking pain and fell to his knees. He looked up and saw an old man being attacked by young muggers. Each blow the man felt, the Dark One felt. He rose to his feet and drew the Black Blade. "Perfect place to start. Sounds like fun."  
  
7.1.1 THE END  
  
I know this story seemed rather ridiculous, but I only did it to play around and do some crazy things. So if you think it sucked, please don't be too critical. 


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